Being a mum  of two pre-school aged boys, I have learned to embrace mess, dirt, noise, shouting,
disruption.  I can certainly say that we do not live in a quiet household!!

Elliot, you still look to your elder brother to learn from and copy and are his little shadow a good 90% of the time.  While you may copy many, many things he does or say, I am noticing that you are
trying to find your own way of saying what you want to say and do what you want to do, while still
playing with your brother.

Ryan, you are the leader of the bunch and are teaching your brother mostly good behaviours.  You
are helping him to pronounce words and learn how things work or the quick way to do things.  We
are lucky that you treat him well and love him as your brother.

Each of you is learning to be YOU and while I hope that you are individuals in your own right, I hope you realise how important it is to have a brother and that you will be there for each other through
​celebrations and despair and everything in between. 

xx

You are getting pretty awesome at amazing me with what your brain is absorbing over the last few
months.  You are learning such diverse things - what makes thunder, why clouds are white or grey,
what camouflage means,  New Zealand has more than 1 million people in the country and even what type of car 'Bumblebee' turns into.  Your brain is a huge sponge that is taking in everything around
you - I love it!

You can read the alphabet and learning about capital and lower case letters, so I thought I would
help to teach you about directions and how to work out if things are either 'left' or 'right' by using
your hands to create a capital 'L'.  

You will take many directions in life.  Some directions will be good ones and others won't, but you
will learn from each path you take.  Sometimes you will follow others down a path and other times
you will be the leader and lead others down a path.  At times you may be one or the other.  You can be both, it's OK as some days you will want to be a leader and other days you will want to be a
follower.  BUT, if you are following, do it because you want to follow - it may be that you want to
​follow to learn from the person who is leading you, but try to follow someone who does good things to you and to others.

Keep up the good work, my "little genius"   xxx

We moved house this month.  This has been a long time coming and a big change in our lives.  We
do not lead transient lives like many people do in other countries and I lived in the same family home with my parents for over 20 years.

We only moved around the corner as I am really happy where we live.  We have friends here, we
have family here.  This little community is our home and where you boys are making new friends and discovering a new world. 

 This new world will seem so big to you both for quite some time.  There will be plenty here to keep you happy and entertained for years to come.  As you reach your teenage years you will want more excitement and more challenges and may look forward to reaching out and discovering something
new and different.  That is what life is all about.  Just know that your father and I will always be here
for you both, the door will always be open to you both, and we are both a phone call or message
away should you need to talk to us or need us for anything.

I always say to you both that to keep this family happy and working we each have a very important
job to do - daddy looks after mummy; mummy looks after Ryan; Ryan looks after Elliot; and Elliot
​looks after daddy.  That is our circle that keeps our family ticking and loving each other.

xx

We have been very fortunate to have healthy children.  Sure there are the bouts of sickness that most families get with young kids, and they can be painful while you are living them, but they pass and full health returns.  We have had one re-occuring ailment with you Elliot, and that is your breathing.  It isn't seasonal and when it hits it hits you hard for about 3-5 days.  

This month, it was so bad that we ended up in hospital for a few hours.  You were carefully and gently examined by a paediatrician and she finally diagnosed you with asthma.  Other doctors have been reluctant to say the word, but this time it was a relief to know that what we had known for quite some time was confirmed.  

We know more about the signs and precautions to take so it doesn't get so severe again.  I know that having "the mask" is not your favourite thing to do, you are very good at counting out the breaths.  We are hoping that you will grow out of this illness as some people do as they get older.

When you are really sick, you are weak and just want to be held and have cuddles.  Sometimes you fall asleep in my arms.  You are my brave little patient and you are simply a little quieter and slower than normal - just like adults.  

Dear Ryan, you are now 4 & 1/2 years old which means that I have 6 more months till you go to
primary school.  We've been calling it "big kids school" for a couple of years now but very soon, you will be one of those "big kids".  Crazy!!!

This year, you have really developed friendships at your daycare and we have been talking about
how to make new friends and how  we can be friends with lots of different people.  You have a little gang of dudes at your daycare - Nicholas, Archie and Noah.  Some days you like playing with them
and other times you don't.  That might be because they do not feel like playing the same thing as you, or might not be feeling well, or want to play with someone else.  It's a hard thing to learn as on those days you have felt sad, but you quickly get over it and are best of buds the next day.  Some of these
friends will be going to the same primary school as you and some may not, but that's ok.  People
move through our life all the time, and while it would be nice to have them in our lives forever, it just doesn't work that way.  People choose different paths to us, and we choose different paths to them.  But we learn from having them in our life - no matter how short or long that may be.

Remember to be as kind as you can to all the people who do pass through your life.  Your Jenma
always said to be, "you may not like the person, but you can always say hello and then move on".  I
don't get on with everyone, very few people do, and that is OK.  But say hello, try to be nice and then get on with what you are doing.  

You are quite a caring little soul, sometimes that can make you quite precious and sensitive, and
while that might mean that not everyone will want to be your friend, remember that I love you.  I'm
​proud of you.  You have a kind and caring heart.  Never loose that.

Mummy xx


I am lucky to share a love of photography with other 'mother's to sons' in a blog circle.  Please be sure to click through to our follow our circle.  Next up is Janecka Lucia, a mother to 3 son's from Ohio, USA and here is her letter to her sons.

Your dad turned 40 this month.

He loves playing with you both.

Sometimes you make him so tired though and he really feels his age.  But then you make us remember our own childhood and the fun things each of us would do and we embrace those times and try to have more fun with you.

You are the treasured men in my life and I wouldn't be the mother I am without the support, unconditional love and kindness that your father gives me.  

I hope that one day in the future, each of you find that same special someone that you want to spend the rest of your life with.  Someone who you will treasure and give your all to.  Someone to explore the world with.  Someone who you will fight for.  Someone who will challenge you.  Someone who will laugh with you, rather than at you.  Someone who will stand by you through some really tough times.  That is what a true partner in life is all about. 

You guys are very lucky.  You have 5 cousins who you see often and you all get along pretty much most of the time.  There is 5 and 3/4 years between all 7 of the cousins (Felix being the eldest and Jemima being the youngest) so it's pretty hectic but that means that you are all a pretty tight unit and when we are all together and there is someone who you can play if someone else doesn't.

I had been trying to get a photo of all of you for quite some time.  It's pretty tricky as not everyone understands and in this case, we couldn't get Jemima in as she was only 3 weeks old. 

I love that the photo is not perfect.  I love that your personalities are shining through and I love that you Ryan, are looking to Felix, who you admire.  While Elliot, you are looking to Ryan, who you admire.  

Everyone is learning to get along with each other and play nicely.  It's a hard thing to learn and it can take years but you have to teach the younger cousins how to behave and what to do.  It's your job to help out the younger members of your family.  They look up to you and learn from what you do.  Don't be afraid to offer to help.  Don't think you are too good or busy to help.  It only takes a few seconds to help someone out.  They will appreciate your help and that you took the time to help them.  That puts kindness into the world and will warm their heart.

Start with helping your family.  Then help your friends.  It's OK to help strangers too.  Be the person who walks up and says, "Can I help you?"

Mum xx

My little dude.  

You have become your father's mate.  I'm sure that Ryan did this too around this age, but at the moment, you want to play with daddy, daddy to change your nappy, daddy to wipe your face, daddy to
click you in to your car seat.  Some days it hurts my heart, but I know that you love me.  You will
always be my baby.  You will always be my brown eyed boy.  My Elliot.  

I love that you are always keen to join in with whatever else is going on in our house, and if you really don't want to join in, you happily go off and make your own fun.  

Your language is really coming along and often I can hear you having some great little conversations with yourself.

You have always enjoyed helping either me or your dad, and we love it.  If dad is going to mow the
lawns, well you are right there beside him with your earmuffs on and pushing your lawnmower
behind him.  If I'm sweeping the floor, you are right there with the brush and shovel to pick up the
crumbs and mess.  You like knowing that you are helping us, trying to be a good boy and getting
​praise from either your dad or I.

You complete our little family and we love you very much.
xx 

Ryan,

You are my little boy who is very quickly turning into a little man.  

Over the Summer months you have really grown up and are listening more and learning to accept changes around you and to live alongside your brother and parents so we have a household that communicates with each other, respects each other and loves each other.

Don't stop wanting to make me happy.  I love it that you are considerate towards my feelings and you get sad when I'm not happy or feeling angry.  Consideration of others is a beautiful trait to have and although it may cause you some hardship later in life as people abuse your caring nature, don't stop doing it.  Thinking of others makes us a beautiful person.

You love animals.  You love playing with your toy animals and you enjoy watching animals on TV and you are intrigued by animals that live around you.  You used to love watching this TV documentary series called 'Africa' over and over again.  Each episode explored the different parts of the African continent and the animals that lived in each region.  I don't know of many 3 year olds who knew what a 'Shoebill' bird was, but you did.  It made me laugh.

At bedtime you normally go to bed with one or two of your soft animals.  You called them your "special cuddlys".  Some nights you stick to your favourites and other nights you swap it around and introduce a new animal into the mix.  You cuddle and talk to these animals before you fall asleep.  This week you have taken to spreading the love to every soft animal toy you have and putting them all into your bed.  There is hardly any room in there for you!!  But you make a nest in amongst them all and snuggle down for a peaceful night's sleep as you are surrounded by your special toys, safe in your bed in your home.

Mum xx

I am lucky to share a love of photography with other 'mother's to sons' in a blog circle.  Please be sure to click through to our follow our circle.  Next up is Janecka Lucia, a mother to 3 son's from Ohio, USA and here is her letter to her sons.

You are two now Elliot.  Not a baby and not a man, but such a rad little dude.  You continue to adore your brother and enjoy playing alongside him, copying him and trying to repeat all that he has to say (even if it's just the highlight of a sentence!).  You think whatever he does is fun and try your hardest to do exactly as he is doing, even if it is a hand stand on the lounge floor!

You giggle and laugh - a sound I love to hear and smile when I do.  You love dancing to the Wiggles and have to watch some Wiggles footage at least once a day.  You show me the dance moves by saying "like this, mummy, like this" and you put your arms in the 'Dorothy the Dinosaur' position.

Your favourite word is "no" and are prone to throw some short-lived 'terrible twos' tantrums.  It's really hard for you as you are not yet able to communicate exactly what you want all the time so get very frustrated with yourself or me or your father.

You have a good temperament and don't let too much get to you and realise that it is easier to give the toy to Ryan than listen to him cry and scream because you have a toy that he wanted.

We enjoyed a great 3 week break over Summer and we watched you grow so much - in height, in your language (3 word 'sentences' are the norm now), your confidence in the water, and learning to play by yourself with toys.  I was sad to say goodbye to the holiday and return to our routine of work and school.  I had better start planning our next little holiday............

Mum xxx